Well Crappitty-Crap
I'm blogging because this is my way of avoiding thinking about the fact that it is 8:19pm NYC time (they get their own time because I don't know what they call it on this side) and tomorrow morning at the horrid hour of 7:30am I will be flying back to Vancouver and then home. The other home.
And I like the other home. But I like it better when it has a Jim at it. I miss Leone and the kitties, but it just makes me so freaken sad to be heading out. Jim has very wisely pointed out a few key things to remember - 1 we are married now so there is none of that uncertainty about "us" as such (not that marriage doesn't take work, yadda yadda, but just that we don't have to reassess "what we are" each time we are separated), 2 he'll be up there again in three weeks and be staying for two more whole months, and 3 that we are in process with immigration and no longer having to do anything with them but wait. Which is a strange relief now compared to the gut-churning ever-lasting feeling of outstanding crap to do for immigration that plagued us for MONTHS.
So today. We had a wonderful day. Brunch with friends, walked around the Met, went shopping to use a wedding gift card we got, walk through Central Park, Monster Sushi.
But now I'm all very sad so I'm becoming preoccupied with random tasks because that is easier than being sad.
I know. Weird.
And now I'll recheck my bags and my packing and maybe allow myself some snuggles which makes me feel better and worse at the same time.
And I like the other home. But I like it better when it has a Jim at it. I miss Leone and the kitties, but it just makes me so freaken sad to be heading out. Jim has very wisely pointed out a few key things to remember - 1 we are married now so there is none of that uncertainty about "us" as such (not that marriage doesn't take work, yadda yadda, but just that we don't have to reassess "what we are" each time we are separated), 2 he'll be up there again in three weeks and be staying for two more whole months, and 3 that we are in process with immigration and no longer having to do anything with them but wait. Which is a strange relief now compared to the gut-churning ever-lasting feeling of outstanding crap to do for immigration that plagued us for MONTHS.
So today. We had a wonderful day. Brunch with friends, walked around the Met, went shopping to use a wedding gift card we got, walk through Central Park, Monster Sushi.
But now I'm all very sad so I'm becoming preoccupied with random tasks because that is easier than being sad.
I know. Weird.
And now I'll recheck my bags and my packing and maybe allow myself some snuggles which makes me feel better and worse at the same time.
posted by jenn at 5:26 p.m.
5 Comments:
Yuck.
Distance sucks.
It will be so nice for you when the wait is over and you can just be together!
What Min said. [hugs]
That's so rough. I'm sorry you have to be apart so much, but I know from experience how much easier it is when the separation is finite. Even though you might not know an exact date, you're not exactly up in the air about how it'll all end.
Awww I'm sorry hun. I hope you're feeling better now.
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